As I age, i find that I am far less accepting of life's little faux pas. I am surly. I growl. I snap at unsuspecting irritants. I look in the mirror and see what my life has pulled down on me. Wrinkles, saddle bags, hair in very strange palaces. I expect things...simple things to proceed as planned. If my cellular bill, for example, is due on the 24th, I expect it to be taken out on that date. Not the 21st, because it falls on a weekend. And when I call the huge multi-national corporation, which I hate, to question why this simple act, cannot happen...when i question the scripted autonoton on the other end of the line...when i point out that the weekend constitutes no variation to a computer tasked with taking that money on the date in question...I am told, snubbingly, that that's how it works...I point out that the computer has no weekend plans, no beach party to attend, no dinner plans with friends. That in fact the only fucking thing that this program, written for this purpose has to do is to take the money from my account on the date that we agreed to...i am told..."we don't know why "it" does that. I feel my blood pressure worsen. I think about all the things that life asks me, us, all of us to endure and I wonder why we are all not gun owners. why we can't just shoot and kill every little thing that annoys us. snotty bank person...dead... person who uses the ten item line at the grocery with coupons and fifteen items...dead...the ass hole that see's all lanes merging into one and speeds forward to cut in at the front of the line...dead and rotting corpse set ablaze... i don't own a gun...i know why..we all just hang on by a thread...we have to choose to let it go...all of it..smile at life's tiniest of pleasures...all the while trying to figure out why the warranty on the washer doesn't cover washing clothes...and why the service guy can't get there for two weeks...dead...dead ...dead
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